Practice with the Bourgeois Problems…

The other evening as my husband talked, a resentment rose up in me for his way of coping with a potentially stressful situation. In my eyes, his coping formula sometimes equals the ‘duck and dive’ method and I had some serious judgement about his avoidance. Inside my...

Wow! vs. Oww

In our deepest relationships, there comes a time when when our partners push us into places of profound discomfort. If we’re lucky, our first response to this challenge might be “Wow, this is work!,” but for so many of us, the complaint is a loud   “our relationship...

The Love Connection.

In every relationship, when the challenges start to feel more familiar than the easy, fun times, the question can arise whether this is really worth the struggle.  Add in some doubts and insecurities, past hurts, perhaps a few ongoing injuries and a tender, sensitive...

Daisies, Presence and Choosing Love

For weeks now, I’ve been walking the path outside my back gate down to the Old Orchard. A group of daisies grows along this path. They stand in the middle of longish grass, among the old gnarled apple trees that have been part of our village for a hundred years. The...

The Rules of Fair Fighting

Rules for Fair Fighting People often come to counselling wanting to resolve communication issues. Let’s face it, communicating can be hard work! While we might like to avoid conflict, that’s generally not possible because we fight for things we care about! However,...